Posts Tagged ‘Personal Development’
WHO AM I?
Excerpt From Relationships That Work: The Power Of Conscious Living
- By David B. Wolf
Expressions such as awakening, enlightenment, self-improvement and personal development have become household words. But what do they really mean? What is it that awakens or enlightens? What is the self that improves? Who is the one that develops?
Through science we know that the body continuously changes and transforms itself. Not one cell in your body now was part of your five-year-old body. Yet when you look at a childhood photo you think, “That is me when I was five,” although the body is completely different. So how do we recognize ourselves? Clearly there is something that remains the same, apart from bodily and even mental changes. This something indicates an identity separate from the body and mind, an unchanging spiritual essence. It is to this spiritual essence that the world’s wisdom traditions point.
The focal point for spiritual principles of personal growth is our true identity beyond the physical body and subtle mind. To be satisfying and complete, our self-help endeavors must recognize this non-physical self. It is common to lose connection with this essential self, even without awareness that we have done so. Soren Kierkegaard once stated, “The greatest danger, that of losing one’s own self, may pass off quietly as if it were nothing; every other loss, that of an arm, a leg, five dollars, a wife, is sure to be noticed.”
Athato brahma jijnasa. This well-known Sanskrit aphorism helps me to remember my spiritual identity and purpose in life. The meaning of the adage is “Now is the time to inquire into the nature of Ultimate reality.” It signifies that now that we possess a human form of life, we have a responsibility to deliberate about spiritual matters. There is some obvious importance in fulfilling the needs of the body, such as eating, sleeping and shelter; However, if our inquiries and endeavors do not extend beyond that, then we are not realizing the capacity of our spirit. If I buy an expensive computer and use it as a doorstop, it will not fulfill its actual potential. Just as the computer can accomplish much more than stopping a door, so we too can use our bodies, mind and intelligence for elevating our consciousness for the purpose of spiritual progress.
Since the word “spiritual” is used in a variety of ways, it is important to define my understanding of the term. By spiritual I mean beyond, or not limited by, materially based identifications—such as “I am thin,” “I am the mother of this child,” “I look great in a suit,” “I am a member of this religion” or “I am a very disciplined person.” These appellations apply to the covering of the spirit self, but not to the actual self.
I drive a Toyota. Naturally I care for the car, keeping it tuned up and filled with the right fluids. But if I think that my own thirst is quenched when I fill the car with gasoline, I am under an illusion and will not be satisfied. I do not believe that I am Japanese just because the car was made in Japan, any more than I would believe myself to be German if I were driving a Mercedes Benz. Clearly this is a foolish idea. Yet if we identify with designations that apply to the temporary body (the vehicle) rather than the spiritual self, we are making the same mistake. Just as the owner of the car changes to another car when the old one is finished, our spirit changes to another body at the time of death. Recognizing and attending to material designations or roles may serve the spiritual journey, just as an automobile can facilitate travel to the destination. But misidentification of the self with these designations is a diversion from our pursuit of spiritual understanding. It often leads to many unhealthy isms, such as nationalism, sexism and racism.
Bodies change, spiritual identity remains. Thoughts also change. Some bring a smile to our face, others are embarrassing. Some are practical, some are outlandish. But we are not our thoughts. So what is the nature of this thing that thinks, that uses fingers to write with a keyboard, that peers through eyes that read, “So what is the nature of this thing that thinks…”?
Conscious Living
“Conscious living entails examining what our habits have made us, and what part of the legacy from our past habits we truly want to keep, and what we choose to discard.”
David B. Wolf
7 Principles For Fulfilling Relationships Radio Show- February 27
Show Hosted by Marie-Helene Glasheen
A time for practical application of the 7 Principles for Fulfilling Relationships. Callers present their real life situation in their relationships.
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From Daniel
“The course has given me invaluable tools for dramatically increasing the quality of my life. I can openly and honestly say that it is the best course I have ever taken. The facilitation created such an incredible atmosphere required for transformation to take place. It seemed like you knew exactly where everyone was coming from, where they needed to go, and how to get there.”
Psychology Student
Combined Course 2002
Blessings
“My imperfections and failures are as much a blessing from God as my successes and my talents and I lay them both at his feet.”
Mahatma Gandhi
True Power in Police Work: A Story of Transformation
by Jens Kirschner
From the Satvatove Archive:
In February 2006 I visited the Satvatove communication and transformation seminars. Till that time I considered myself as intelligent, self-confident, male and superior. I was able to express myself very well and convince others about my views. Discussions were battles for me that I wanted to win. Based on what I had heard about the Foundational Course, I did not consider it to be of great importance for me. I looked at the Advanced Course as a challenge.
In both courses I experienced completely new patterns and ways of dealing with myself and other people. Already in the Foundational Seminar I felt shaken, confused, weak and needy. Several times I wanted to run away as I was rediscovering my emotional personality. At the end of the Advanced Seminar I had decided to leave my job as a police officer, as my newly discovered “soft” side didn’t seem to fit that occupation anymore. However, at the start of the course we had agreed not to make major life decisions till at least two weeks after the end of the seminar, so I remained in my job.
After the courses I developed a new kind of self-confidence. I’ve reflected on myself and have learnt to accept other people with different opinions. I’ve learned to care about myself and in doing so I’ve also learned to show my environment that I care. I wouldn’t say my life is easier now. In some ways it has become more difficult since I’ve started to genuinely take responsibility for my life. But I have so much more energy available now and for the first time in my life I really feel alive.
My personal change has definitely affected my work as a police officer. Colleagues and citizens feel understood by me, valued and accepted. They have expressed how they have noticed and appreciate the shift in my character. I now feel much safer in my dealings as a policeman. Conflict situations are much less about me personally. In recent months, due to awareness of myself and attentiveness to be empathic in communication, I have encountered only one situation where a citizen resisted my actions in my law enforcement capacity.
In that special case I acted with fierce determination, while simultaneously considerate towards the offender. He was aggressive, and a threat to other young men present, as well as to myself and other police officers. To protect everyone involved I acted quickly and firmly. I did this with calm, with clear intention not to harm. I forced the offender to the ground, and the situation was efficiently resolved. Afterwards I helped the young man to his feet and with gentleness explained about further procedures. My colleagues were amazed that the encounter ended in an almost friendly mood between everyone. Instead of leaving police work, I am endeavoring to integrate my discovered qualities and personal communication strategies into this vocation, and the results have been deeply rewarding.
Attitude of Gratitude
Towards the end of December we held a Satvatove appreciation dinner here in North Florida, where, since 1999 there have been 25 Foundational Seminars, 14 Advanced Seminars, 8 Life Mastery Programs, and dozens of workshops and other Satvatove adventures. In attendance were about 20 Satvatove graduates who have contributed in special ways to sharing and expanding the impact of the Satvatove experience. Tears flowed. Laughter abounded. It was a memorably sweet experience, fulfilling in every respect- emotionally, spiritually, and gastronomically- as Dave cooked and we all stuffed ourselves beyond reasonable limits.
The special contributions represented at the dinner were quite diverse, covering areas such as accounting, video production, staffing, Satvatove Summit cruise organization, and assistance with room set-up for seminars. Reflecting on the past year I am moved to especially recognize those who took a stand and created a Satvatove seminar. Sometimes we say that if twenty people are interested and excited about a course happening in a particular locality- the course doesn’t happen. However, if one person has clear intention- “This course will happen”- then the seminar manifests. And of course, then the other 10, 20 or 30 who are enthusiastic contribute and synergize, around the one whose commitment is unshakable.
Sanya, Annette and Peter moved mountains in Switzerland to organize two combined Foundational/Advanced Seminars in 2009. This was the fourth set of Satvatove seminars organized by Sanya since 2006, and my heartfelt appreciation goes to her for these prodigious efforts. There has been a resurgence in Satvatove spirit in North Florida, and Lacey is the main reason for this. Our gratitude goes to Lacey for organizing the Foundational in March, 2009, and fully energizing the other courses in North Florida with the many workshops she has arranged, her caring heart and her unstoppable determination. Breaking new ground (or perhaps, ice) were Tina and Krista. Tina refused to acknowledge any obstacles and organized a Foundational in Edmonton in February (-30 F in the sun), and Krista transcended all limitations in creating the Satvatove Foundational in Petersboro, Ontario. Bringing together international forces, Sanaka manifested an unforgettable spiritual, transformative experience in Vrndavana, India, in November. And special thanks to Govinda Syer for arranging for pervasive Satvatove presence, including several workshops and presentations, at the mela in Los Angeles, and for his ongoing, active support for the programs of Satvatove for the past decade.
Self-Judgment
Excerpt From A Coaching Letter Written By David Wolf
In this letter David points to how we stifle our growth and self-discovery by our judgments.
. . . I hear how you are noticing your tendency to give the power for and control of your experience to [ ]. It seems that you’re not just noticing it, you’re also judging yourself for it.
“Judging” in the sense that your reaction is not merely “I’m not satisfied and I’m committed to change,” but rather “This isn’t good”. I mention this because oftentimes if our inspiration for change comes from a place of self-acceptance, we’re more likely to succeed at and enjoy the process, compared with when our motivation is driven by harsh self-judgment. I’m not saying that you’re reaction necessarily indicates harsh self-judgment. I’m perceiving that there is something in you, in connection with your relationship with [ ], that you want to shift. You sense that there is a growth opportunity here. In pursuing that self-discovery I encourage you to look at the consciousness behind it, in the spirit of “The consciousness that created a problem is not able to resolve the problem.” . . .
Rising Up Early?
Excerpt From A Coaching Letter Written By David Wolf
My experience with myself and many others is that rising early is a fairly common challenge- a battle with the senses, the physical urge to want to sleep, that many, if not most, encounter. Just like the senses want to eat more than required, or watch mindless tv, or so many other things that, without conscious restraint, will distract us from meaningful life purpose. An analogy that comes to mind is that of the chariot. It is pulled by five horses, representing the five senses. The self is the passenger, the intelligence is the driver, and the reins are the mind. So, balance is the key. If we let the horses run wild, then obviously that will create a precarious situation, that might land us in a ditch, or off a cliff. Similarly, if we pull the reins too tight (analogously, exerting undue willpower to control the senses- maybe fasting too much, or sleep deprivation, or simply a lack of healthy recreation), then horses buck, and again we’re not controlling the chariot of the body with spiritual strength and intelligence. So, at each phase of life, with each of the senses, it’s an art and science to know how much rein to give.
I think it important here for you to have empathy and compassion for all parts of yourself, including the part that wants to sleep in, and the part that is frustrated, disappointed, that you’re wasting time in that way. I know that you know that if you had full, genuine, sincere clear intention to do so, you’d make those changes. I’m not saying that for you to be harsh with yourself, but rather for you to simply notice what you’re actually committed to, and what you’re not. With such awareness you get to consider what further changes you’re actually ready to put into effect. For whatever you’re not willing to do, you also get to look at how satisfied you are with that choice, and to what extent it may be driven by denial. Whatever denial may be there could very possibly be sapping energy, draining inspiration, with a practical result such as turning off the alarm in the morning for that extra half hour, or two hours, instead of being commitment-driven and tolerating the short-term pain of getting up, with the mid- and long-term benefit of a more productive day, maybe feeling better about yourself, etc. By examining whatever denial might be there, and what it’s made of, you come to a higher level of personal responsibility for your situation, including your motivation level.
From the Courses in Vrindavan, India
Read some comments from graduates of the recent Satvatove Vrndavana experience.
After the Foundational Seminar S. K. Boehm commented “It was a mind-blowing experience.” And after the Advanced Seminar Experience she wrote “The Satvatove Advanced Seminar opened new dimensions of myself to me. I am now able to do things I thought to be impossible before. I got some great tools for communication and relationships. I realized that I have much unused potential in myself, which I am now going to apply in my life.”
Stefano, father of Sanaka (who organized these Vrndavana seminars), expressed:
“Thank you for allowing me to participate in the Satvatove courses in Vrndavana. This was a kind of journey inside myself. Due to my intense desire to change and the great help of Sanaka, I experienced amazing results. The most important result for me- it was feeling my heart opening to the love for my son. I found my son after 32 years.”
And Maria, Sanaka’s mother, shared: “During my life I have tried many things in the attempt to overcome my self-destructive mental and emotional tendencies and habits. The Satvatove seminar was the most powerful healing experience to date; it was an amazing journey that brought me from the darkness of my heart to the light of my genuine healthy self. I experienced the seminar as a sort of rebirth, guided and supported by loving, dedicated and qualified people.”
Priya, who travelled from Florida to India for the courses, wrote “…I had a magical experience with all of you…”
A sannyasi is a member of the renounced order of life in the Vedic spiritually-based social system. We had a sannyasi in the Vrndavana courses- Visnu Swami, who shared:
“I feel really good after the Satvatove Experience. In the beginning when David was talking about transformation I thought that it was just a catchy way to sell the Satvatove advanced course. But to my pleasant surprise I feel transformed. The entire world looks different now. I feel more confident, balanced and capable then I ever did. I feel that now with clear intention and…accountability, actually with just everything from Satvatove, I can achieve anything. For a long time I ‘ve been wanting to get a few things established in my day and life, like an exercise program, reading and studying etc and now I am actually doing them. I am not stressed out all the time like I used to be. …The whole experience has just been magical. And being with this special group made it even better. I really don’t think it would have been the same magic with a different group….I got in a little disagreement with my little brother. I hurt his feelings. I was annoyed with him and he was annoyed with me. Normally when this happens I just say something that makes me feel that I am the ‘good guy’ and that makes me feel that I am right, we would ignore what happened and forget about it (or pretend to forget about it). But this time I busted out the Satvatove stuff and really listened to him and reflected. It worked!! The bad feelings all disappeared and we had an amazingly close connection with each other. It was great!!”
From Bimala Naysmith, about the Foundational Seminar- “I had already participated in the Foundational before, so I somewhat knew what to expect. I don’t think though I had anticipated how much I would realise this time round. I definitely feel this really is the beginning for me…”
And about his Advanced Course experience- “The Advanced Course really allowed me to get in touch with myself- Allowing me to communicate and understand others around me in a far deeper and richer way. I have already used some of the tools in my communication with my partner and understand where she is coming from and what she is saying…”
Jay:
Foundational- “I can see how if the number of people with these tools increased, so would the quality of communication…”
Advanced- “… I have never cried so much. I have never laughed so much. I have never danced so much. I miss the experience in all its intensity, fear, and joy. I felt so safe and vulnerable at the same time. It was a challenge for me to break through the numbness and though I did not feel as successful as others, that was my challenge: to fight that numbness and learn more about myself regardless. What a grand group of people to have on that journey!
“Though it is too soon to honestly know the true difference, I definitely feel a change between the person I was walking in, and the person I was walking out. …I feel like I got more of an idea of what I want out of life and who I am as a person. …Thank you once again for my experience. I have shared with so many people the alternative perspective you brought about, especially taking responsibility for the choices I make…”
Celine:
I had a breakthrough during a debate (one could even say argument;o)) …where at first neither of us wanted to get into the other’s world, so we just kept emphasizing our own point/experience. The conversation was going downhill fast and I realized that I could choose to get into his world. I knew it would make him feel happy and understood. However, my ego didn’t want to because I was worried that my point wouldn’t be heard in the end, or would end up being minimized if I understood and valued his….:o) BUT I decided to do some reflective listening anyway, and I actually ended up finding it quite fun. As he got more and more happy and felt more and more understood, I found myself actually loving it and getting really into the empathy of it. By the end I was shocked to find that I didn’t even care about my point being heard, and EVEN more shocking is that by the end of it I didn’t even care much about my point altogether; It no longer mattered to me as much as it had at first……and I felt uplifted…… So I will try this again, especially when I am attached to not letting go of my view/point….I’ll even gather the courage to try it with those close to me, where it is needed most, and yet harder to do. I’ll risk my point not being valued, in order to create a space where those close to me feel honored, and their point valued……..”
